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THE INSIDE CONNECTION: Focusing on what's most important.
A free newsletter from Kesslin Associates Inc.
http://www.kesslin.com
mailto:insideconnection@kesslin.com
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ISSUE NO. 6 - APRIL 2002
In this issue...
1) Welcome
2) Inside The Inside Connection
3) Feature: The Kabbalah Connection
4) Action Tip
5) Related Resources
Subscription, unsubscribe and copyright information can be found at
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1) Welcome
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Thank you for joining us to explore The Inside Connection. We want
to encourage, challenge, and support you to explore your full
potential. We believe that success comes most directly when you
look inside yourself first, before seeking change from other people
or the things around you. If you enjoy our e-zine, please forward
it to colleagues, friends and family who might benefit.
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2) Inside The Inside Connection
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Living and working in New York City has been more intense than
usual since 9/11. But I think you could also say that about
Afghanistan, the Middle East, and many other places around the
globe. Have you ever wondered why people cling to spiritual beliefs
in times of trouble? Or, how people can continue to believe in a
benevolent god with all the seemingly senseless tragedy that
occurs?
This month's article is about spirituality. Please join me in
making this conversation more public.
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3) Feature: The Kabbalah Connection
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Why don't we talk more about spirituality, meaning, and fulfillment
in the business world? Why do these topics feel like they're "off
limits" for discussion?
Someone must've decided that businesses would function more
efficiently if everything personal were checked at the door before
entering the office. How could anyone believe that doing that would
maximize potential if such an important part of each employee was
left outside the office? I know that anytime you deny a part of who
you are in order to fit in someplace, you also deny a corresponding
portion of your power, effectiveness, and potential.
So consider this article an open invitation to join me in having
conversations about spirituality in the workplace.
I consider myself a spiritual person, but not a religious one. My
definition of spirituality is pretty simple. I believe that each of
our lives has a purpose and a meaning that is somewhat beyond our
complete understanding. I also believe that much, if not all of
what we do in life - our relationships, our work, our hobbies, all
our interests, thoughts and activities - is part of a larger
picture designed to help us develop and reach our true potential.
In other words, I believe there's more to life than we can ever
completely perceive or know. For those of us with lots of
curiosity, this gives us endless opportunities for learning. And,
taking a "student" perspective to life is a great way to
consistently see problems and challenges as learning opportunities.
When I was practicing psychotherapy, working with people facing
serious and painful life issues, I needed to remember that even
when I did everything in my power to help, their situation might
not improve. I could only do my best. I always took some comfort in
knowing that there might be some greater purpose to my clients'
struggles that I wasn't privileged to know about - a spiritual
purpose.
Spirituality has been on my mind since I attended an Open House at
the Kabbalah Center here in New York City last month. After an
afternoon of sample classes and hearing some of what Kabbalah
teaches, I was interested enough to buy two of their books. As soon
as I'd read a few pages in The Power of Kabbalah by Yehuda Berg, I
knew why I was interested.
Kabbalah is reported to be the ancient spiritual mysticism that
predated and formed the basis for three major world religions -
Judaism, Christianity and Islam. What was interesting was how much
of Kabbalah agrees with what I believe about life and the world,
and how much it reinforces the focus of The Inside Connection.
Here's my brief version of what both Kabbalah and The Inside
Connection say:
The world you experience is largely a reflection of yourself. As
you change who you are, the world reflects those changes back to
you. What gives you the most effective and reliable source of power
to create change in the world is your willingness to: 1) deeply
know yourself, 2) accept responsibility for your thoughts, feelings
and actions, and 3) change yourself.
Wayne Dyer tells a story about walking along the beach when he's
recognized by a man who is surprised to discover that Dyer lives in
that beach town. The man asks him what the people are like in the
town as he's considering moving there. Before responding, Dyer
asks: "What are the people like where you live now?" The man
replies: "I live in a big city and everyone is mean and nasty.
I
don't have many friends and I really don't like it at all. I'm
hoping that the people here in this beach town will be nicer and
friendlier." Dyer then tells him that unfortunately the people
here
are very similar to the ones he's trying to get away from in the
big city.
On that same walk, someone else approaches Dyer asking essentially
the same question - What are the people like here? Dyer inquires
about the people back home and this person says: "I have wonderful
friends and neighbors. The people are warm and friendly and I've
got lots of close relationships." Dyer says that the people in
his
town are very much like that too!
So Kabbalah, Dyer, and The Inside Connection all agree.
What you experience in the world is very much of your own creation.
If you want to see a change when you look out into the world, the
first change you need to make is an inner change - a change in the
viewer, not the viewed. Rather than focusing on adjusting and
fixing the world, first connect inside and make any needed inner
adjustments. The starting place for effective, sustainable change
is always an inner look.
When we look at our own inside connection - at what we think, feel,
believe, and see as possibility or as limitation - we can most
accurately assess how we have contributed to the problem or
challenge that we see in front of us. Once we're clear about our
contribution, it's much easier to know what to do. Anytime we
forget to acknowledge or accept responsibility for the part we play
in a situation, we lose the power to truly transform it.
If we believe that the world is a spiritual mirror, then any
problem we face offers the opportunity for personal growth and
development. In order to take advantage of the opportunity, we need
to look inward before acting out.
Taking a look inside means examining what we think, feel, believe,
and see as possible. What are the real or imagined limitations we
see? What role does our anger and lack of acceptance play? Only
after answering these kinds of questions for ourselves can we hope
to create and see sustained change in the world around us.
Inner work is much more challenging for most people than running
around trying to fix things, but ultimately it's much more
effective and actually easier. If you've ever heard the saying: "No
matter where you go, there you are," that's what we're talking
about. No matter what you achieve in the world around you, you're
still the same person dealing with the same issues. It's only when
you change yourself that issues resolve forever.
So do the inner work. It may not feel as exciting or as productive
as running around and fixing everything, but eventually you'll
thank yourself.
In the physical world that we inhabit, there's a huge difference in
believing you are the center of the universe (egotism) versus
recognizing the full power you have to influence the world around
you.
The first time I remember flying in a plane as a child, I couldn't
comprehend how something that big and heavy could actually fly in
the sky (sometimes I still find it hard to believe!). Since we
must've visited one of the TV or movie studios on that trip to
California, I imagined that whenever I flew in a plane, someone was
really scrolling scenery by my window and rearranging everything
outside the plane (changing the set) so I'd think we'd actually
traveled somewhere. Essentially I imagined the entire world as if
it revolved around me and my view. I was Truman in The Truman Show.
Eventually I changed my belief about what was going on. I realized
that not everything revolved around me. That I was actually flying
when in a plane. But I'm not so sure my shift in beliefs and
perspective was accurate from a spiritual perspective. Kabbalah
suggests that my childlike view of a world that instantly reacts to
me and my every action, is an accurate spiritual perspective. That
every action you take and every thought you have has a real and
tangible impact on the material world we live in. We just don't
know exactly how, or when, that impact will occur.
From a spiritual perspective, what goes around always comes around.
you just never know exactly when.
In the business world, there's a lot of resistance to talking
publicly about spirituality. Using words like soul, meaning, love,
decency, life purpose, fulfillment, and human kindness make many
business people uncomfortable in public. What always amazes and
delights me, though, is how many of those same people want to talk
about just these topics when they're behind closed doors in a
confidential coaching session.
What will it take to bring these important conversations out from
behind closed office doors?
If these topics are important to you, I hope you'll take a risk and
start talking about them at work. When you do, you'll stop leaving
some of your best self "outside the office door" and you'll
open
the door for others to do the same.
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4) Action Tip
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Do an INSIDE CONNECTION CHECK-IN when you realize it's time to take
a look in the mirror of your life. Whenever you notice you're not
feeling or doing your best, consider these questions:
o What are you thinking... feeling... judging?
o What triggered those thoughts, feelings and judgments?
o Are you seeing possibilities or limitations?
o What is your situation showing you about yourself?
o What role did you play in creating the situation you now face?
o What do you have the power to change?
o What resources do you need to be at your best right now?
o Do you need to talk with anyone for counsel or to help you
examine the situation?
o What can you learn from this experience?
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5) Related Resources
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ONLINE
The Kabbalah Center
http://www.kabbalah.com
Dr. Wayne Dyer
http://www.drwaynedyer.com
BOOKS
The first two books are two easy to read, easy to understand
summaries of the ancient spiritual tradition of Kabbalah. Whether
you believe the information is true or not, it's still challenging
and useful.
The Power of Kabbalah
by Yehuda Berg
An easy to digest introduction to the wisdom of Kabbalah and its
teachings.
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/158872008X/kesslinassociate
The Way: Using the Wisdom of Kabbalah for Spiritual Transformation
and Fulfillment
by Michael Berg
Covers much of the same information as The Power of Kabbalah, with
a focus on applying its principles to daily life.
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0471083003/kesslinassociate
When Bad Things Happen to Good People
by Harold S. Kushner
From Amazon.com review: Rarely does a book come along that tackles
a perennially difficult human issue with such clarity and
intelligence. Harold Kushner, a Jewish rabbi facing his own child's
fatal illness, deftly guides us through the inadequacies of the
traditional answers to the problem of evil, then provides a
uniquely practical and compassionate answer that has appealed to
millions of readers across all religious creeds. Remarkable for its
intensely relevant real-life examples and its fluid prose, this
book cannot go unread by anyone who has ever been troubled by the
question, "Why me?"
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0380603926/kesslinassociate
There's a Spiritual Solution to Every Problem
by Wayne W. Dyer
From Amazon.com review: With his usual mix of enthusiasm, optimism,
and anecdote, Dr. Wayne Dyer is back again to emphasize that we are
in control of our life experiences. Quoting everything from the
Bible to The Tao of Pooh, he returns continually to his central
point: with truth and self-awareness, all things are possible,
including physical healing, improved relationships, and great
personal accomplishment. There's a Spiritual Solution to Every
Problem dissects what is meant by the word problem and shows us how
to achieve our deepest wishes with surprisingly simple suggestions.
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0060192305/kesslinassociate
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THE INSIDE CONNECTION is a free monthly publication from Kesslin
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The Inside Connection
ISSN: #1535-1076 Library of Congress, Washington, DC
Copyright c 2002 by Ken Kesslin - All rights reserved.
http://www.kesslin.com
mailto:insideconnection@kesslin.com
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